Growing up in an African Household

I have been meaning to put out this post for a while however I wasn’t sure how to discuss certain things or navigate this topic but I am ready as ever now.


If you didn’t know already, I am an African girl – Ghanaian to be exact actually and for me growing up in an African household has been interesting to say the least. I was born and raised in Ghana and lived there for about 11 years. During my time in Ghana, I lived with my grandmother who was very very lenient. I think it was partly due to the fact that we were in a familiar environment and knew everyone in our small community. Everyone was basically family so I was allowed to do whatever I wanted within reason and I had an amazing childhood there!

When I moved to the UK with my mum though, we were in an unfamiliar territory and in an unfriendly neighbourhood with people we didn’t know. This meant that my mum was a lot stricter and being the only child made it that much worse. I couldn’t do certain things I could do before in Ghana and even though I hated it at the time, I understood her reasons.

I think in an African household, parents usually have their reasons for setting certain rules and boundaries. I remember not being allowed to go to sleepovers and I absolutely hated it at the time but now that I am older, I am very thankful I wasn’t allowed because as we all know, we live in a very scary world.
I do think though that as you get older, you have to challenge these rules by simply breaking them. You honestly have to start living your life for you. The most they can do is be upset and complain about it, but over time they’ll get tired of doing so.

What I also came to terms with as I got older was that our parents come from a different era with a completely different set of upbringing so patience is required when dealing with them. This isn’t to say that it’s okay to tolerate disrespectful or abusive behaviour. Please I am not here for that AT ALL. I think I have accepted that sometimes our views on certain matters may clash however it’s important to correct them on views they may hold that you feel could be problematic or offensive! You’d actually be surprised that when done respectfully they actually take it in (well my mum does!)

One thing I can also add is that growing up in an African household builds character especially living in the west with parents who didn’t grow up here. African parents can really be a handful but you’ve got to love them. At the end of the day parents are also humans; they do not know it all and they make mistakes too. Although I am not a parent yet, parenting seems like a whole different ball game and seems like a journey in which you learn as you go! So I’ve definitely started cutting my mum some slack if I am being honest.

Lastly is it just me or do you feel like as you have gotten older your parents have become a lot more understanding and shock you (in good ways) with certain things they now say or tolerate?!

I would honestly like to keep this conversation going! What are you guys’ thoughts and are there anything you’d like to add? What were your experiences like growing up in an African household?


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27 thoughts on “Growing up in an African Household”

  1. I loved reading this!! I didn’t grow up in an African household, but I can relate in a way as my dad was very strict. I loved when you said in order to break the rules you need to challenge them & I definitely started to learn that as I went into college. Thank you for this and thank you for opening up about your upbringing!!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Hey love.

    A lot of what you said resonates with me. Island parents are strict overall, but their reasoning behind some of their rules is understandable. Girl, sleepovers were a NO in my household too. As I got older, I appreciate that my mother did not allow it because now we hear stories like never before of men and women who were taking advantage of as a child.

    Thank you for sharing this post!

    xoxo,
    Widster

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I can relate to a lot of this growing in an Asian household ! Although my parents were strict and still are a little bit I totally understand where they are coming from. But they have also changed with times and I’m also surprised by their changing views! Love to see it 💜

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is a wonderful post! I agree with everything you’ve said. In an Indian household it was all the same! And yes, we must push the envelope or remain stilted.

    And yes! They are so mellow now…..and it’s har day times to reconcile that. But, progress is progress.

    I enjoyed this a lot!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this, I really appreciate that❤️ and honestly! We’ve time parents definitely become a lot more understanding when it comes to so many things

      Like

  5. Trust me when I say I can totally relate to almost everyday you said here. African parents aren’t actually the easiest when it comes to their rules but I’ve learned that these rules build character. I loved reading this and all your hair posts. I guess I found it fascinating because I have no idea about weaves, I do braids mostly. Your blog is real nice.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for checking out my blog❤️ and showing love to my posts, I really really appreciate it! On the topic of African parents I definitely agree that they’re not the easiest to deal with

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I could totally relate to this post. My
    Nigerian parents have always been strict and I totally understand why. Sleepovers were a no and the curfews were tight. They’ve become more understanding as I grew older. Still waiting till I’l have total freedom though 😄

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I can totally relate to this! My mother never let me go to sleepovers either! I am grateful for her boundaries even the more, now that I have a daughter! Between her Black southern Mama and Ghanaian father-she won’t be able to go anywhere either 😂

    Liked by 1 person

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